5/17/2012

A field of lupine—

movement! A heron’s stalky

gait through grass and blue.

One of These Inspired by a Phrase I Heard from Chris Moon

In this haze of grief

I see nothing clearly but

the shapes of shadows.

Midnight, and I lie

awake, dreading tomorrow.

Pillow Test Fail.

Not a Haiku & Really Depressing

The deer dragged its broken legs behind it

along the freeway.  It hid in the brush,

and I waited with the girl who hit it.

We hoped that maybe, just maybe,

this deer, with wide eyes and fur that looked like living velvet,

this deer could be saved,

that it could be released back into the wild,

that it could end up in a petting zoo – anything –

to assuage her guilt and my sadness and to will 

this deer, this innocent, to live.

Then the police came, and the big blond one said casually,

Yeah, he’s not gonna make it.  You girls should just go.

We’re gonna put him out of his misery. 

This is the parta my job I can’t talk to my wife about.

And I heard myself say Oh, and felt my chest cave in,

and as I drove home I thought

I can’t save anything.  I can’t save anybody. 

I couldn’t save that deer;

I couldn’t save you.

I can’t save anybody.

My Not-So-Secret Life as the Hulk

Grief is an abyss.
Falling, I stop only when
I become angry.